SAYING YES IN A NO WORLD

Saying "Yes" in a "No" World


Verna J. Dozier
Originally published in The Witness magazine, May 1990

	In a world that exalts whiteness, maleness, youth, I live by the faith that whiteness, maleness, youth is not the best part of reality -- nor the worst either -- but only part of reality and indeed, without blackness, femaleness, age, a very incomplete part.

I'm me

I'm good

'Cuz God made me

And God don't make junk.

I see that motto every day of my life. It hangs in my bedroom beside a small chest of drawers. It is spelled in different colored letters on burlap.

I grew up black in a world in which white was right. I am female in a world in which male is the currency of power. I am old in a culture that idolizes youth.

I'm me

I'm good

'Cuz God made me

And God don't make junk.

This is a faith statement.

For all who believe it, it is the Judeo-Christian declaration of independence from every tyranny of the demeaning estimates of the world. But it is a faith statement. Faith is something I live by. It is a decision to risk that this is the way God meant the world to be. In a world that exalts whiteness, maleness, youth, I live by the faith that whiteness, maleness, youth is not the best part of reality --nor the worst either -- but only part of reality and indeed, without blackness, femaleness, age, a very incomplete part.

In strange ways that only the faithful know -- and I cannot articulate -- faith is not only the decision to risk; it is also the power to make that decision. It is the courage to be, to affirm yourself in the face of all that denies you.

To be able to say YES to yourself when all the environment is shouting NO, but to be able to listen to that NO and hear what message it is sending from which you can profit -- in my experience, that is certainly beyond the possibility of fragile human beings. That takes a leap of faith. That takes a religious dimension.

I was taken on a tour of Ethiopian museums a few years ago by a bitter, hostile youth. He said to me as he proudly showed off the figures of Ethiopian kings in all their splendid regalia, "I do not see why they always picture us as naked savages. We have always worn clothes." I wondered why wearing clothes was to him such a sign of worth. In the Genesis story nakedness was a sign of innocence. Human beings only felt the need for clothing when they felt the need to hide. But obviously my young dude was taking his signals from another drummer, and not necessarily the drummer of his fathers.

With sublime arrogance, Sir Kenneth Clarke writes a book about a small part of the world and calls it Civilization, and even proud blacks who would protest it must fall unwitting prey to the stance.

Out of scores of definitions for "black" in the Oxford English Dictionary, only a few are not pejorative. Black hearse, black days, black moods. Black is bad. White is good. Howard Thurman noted that Moby Dick is the only instance in American literature where white is a sign of evil.

So blacks follow that example. If blacks have been condemned by whites, blacks will condemn whites. You hate me, I will hate you more.

The response was inevitable, since we all, I believe, participate in fallenness, but there is no redemption in the response. If I have to say a death-dealing NO to you in order to say YES to myself, you still have power over me. I am still bound by the model you set. There is no freedom for me in that. I cannot point the way to a new reign of God that way.

Living by the death of the other, however, not only characterizes the relationships between the races; it characterizes the relationships between the sexes.

Women the world over are struggling to find a new definition of themselves, and their big handicap in the struggle, as I see it, is we have no model but the male one. Kill or be killed, win or lose, YES to me, NO to you.

Western civilization said NO to the black. East and West said NO to women. But the United States has written its own unique chapter in human history in its disparagement of the aging.

If I have to say a death-dealing NO to you in order to say YES to myself, you still have power over me. I am still bound by the model you set. There is no freedom for me in that. I cannot point the way to a new reign of God that way.

Dourness about growing old is not, of course, unique in America. Ecclesiastes warns, "Remember now thy creator in the days of youth, while the evil days come not nor the years draw nigh when thou shall say, I have no pleasure in them." Then the old preacher goes on to paint as grim and realistic a picture of aging as you will find anywhere:

… and the keepers of the house shall tremble, and the strong men shall bow themselves, and the grinders cease because they are few, and those that look out of the windows be darkened … And also they shall be afraid of that which is high, and fears shall be in the way …

In our country the picture is grim. This is a young country, and we have always worshipped at the shrine of youth. Old and ugly companion each other in our thoughts like apple pie and cheese.

"What's new?" is the classic American greeting, and growing old is a fate worse than death. Our folk heroes are those who lived hard and fast and died young. The specter of turning 40 traumatizes the nation. Mid-life is a crisis. Robert Butler aptly titles his book about growing old in America, Why Survive? And the question is not lightly asked. Our culture writes the aging off. We can look forward to victimization by young hoodlums in the decaying neighborhoods to which our lowered earning power condemns us, and victimization by our government because we are increasingly powerless and dependent.

Our wrinkled skin and slowed movements are too-vivid reminders to the young of the fate that awaits us all, and they would just as soon forget it. The good news for me in growing old is that the old have the possibility of breaking that vicious human history of living by the death of the other. Older people have an invaluable gift to bring to the world -- the gift of reconciliation. I have always been responsive to the Native American saying about not passing judgment on another human being until you have walked a mile in his/her moccasins. It occurs to me that therein lies the possibility for a holy gift the old can offer our increasingly polarized society. Blacks have never been white -- a white reporter tried to be black once, but the catch was that he could never really understand what it was like to be black with no escape hatch. Women have never been men. Men have never been women.

Older people can model a kingdom-of-God way for the opposing camps in our society. We have known what it is to be young and angry. In our time we have raged against the tyranny of our elders. We have walked that mile in another's moccasins. We have another life to remember. We have another word to say.

How often the NO is said to those who look different. You can't be the same as I. You look so different. From there it is a short step to, "You can't be as good as I. You are inferior."

In the face of that NO, I, for my soul's sake, must do two things. I must first affirm myself, affirm the very realities the other denies.

Yes, I am black and blackness is good.

	Older people can model a kingdom-of-God way for the opposing camps in our society. We have known what it is to be young and angry. In our time we have raged against the tyranny of our elders. We have walked that mile in another's moccasins. We have another life to remember. We have another word to say.

Yes, I am a woman, and womanhood is good.

Yes, I am old, and age is good.

Ultimately, I can only do that by the power of a Creator who is for me. "If God be for us," says St. Paul, "who can be against us?"

And that trust brings me to the second thing I affirm in the face of the NO against me.

You are white or brown or copper, and any color is good.

You are male, and maleness is good.

You are young, and youth is good.

The Creator is for all creation. "And God saw everything that God had made, and behold, it was very good. And the evening and the morning were the sixth day."

That is my faith. And that, to me, is the new possibility for a new humanity, every man, woman and child saying YES to themselves and YES to every other human being.

We're us

We're good

'Cuz God made us

And God don't make junk.